I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize