I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
How's work?
Spinning.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
