Bisexual people are plain selfish.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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