Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
