This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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