Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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