Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
