i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
