the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
