So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
