If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
