I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
