You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
