Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize