All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she peed on how many people?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
