her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Sex in the backyard? Check.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
