You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
