I want to stick my p in your. b.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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