if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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