so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
