And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize