Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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