chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
