you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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