You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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