i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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