In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
