I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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