Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
