Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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