i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
