My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
