So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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