btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
