i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
