Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize