I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
