It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize