Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
We're too hungover to prance.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
