That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
