don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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