Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
This baby is an asshole
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
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