He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
