You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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