I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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