I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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