I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
