the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
