What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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