awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
