is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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